I feel kinda nostalgic lately. Maybe its because i'm spending a bit more time at the cottage with my parents. Maybe it's the summer. Whatever the reason, I'm suddenly remembering the times of my childhood and how much I miss running around after my sister and brother.
I know that as we grow up and forge our own paths in life we tend to lose focus on what matters the most - and that is family. It holds us together, forces us to comply and make sacrifices, grounds us in our daily routines.
I'm having my last - what I call "bettering myself" - session today and it'll focus heavily on my childhood, which is making me both anxious and nostalgic all at the same time. I was sure I would be ready to go back in the past and relive the moments I've cherished but I don't think I am.
If you have been following my blog, you know that my relationship with my sister isn't the same anymore - it has evolved. In the last year I've seen my sister as much as I have in one week only two years ago. And I miss that. I miss having my sister, my friend to talk to, share laughs with, discuss current events, however heated the debate got.
When I was younger, even though my brother loved to torment and scare me - like every older brother - he was still there each and every time I got scared at night. Even if he won every single monopoly game or didn't feel like it, he'd still play with me.
And our trips at the cottage, when all three of us would swim out to the floating docks, my brother lifting us up onto the platform for us to wave and scream and laugh as our mother snapped pictures.
And then I realise how lucky I am. To have those memories. And to be able to cherish them. Maybe I am ready to dive into the past.
Candles are out,